Is there gas in the car? Yes, there's gas in the car.

• I saw Steely Dan with Tonya and Dave on Friday. It was fun. I didn't recognize all of the songs, but I enjoyed it anyway. The back-up singers had nice butts. The one closest to us had a very nice butt, but she air-drummed and air-guitared and all that. So on one hand, nice butt. On the other hand, annoying air-instrumentation. Which of those outrules the other? (And it was Ruiz, not Raul, that you were getting high with. Yoooooou were high.) Also, Donald Fagen is cool and such, but Walter Becker is a worthless piece of crap. He must know where to get the good blow or something.


• I'm visiting my parents this coming weekend. In Michigan, for those who don't know where I'm originally from (Evart Michigan, home of the Dulcimer Fun Fest). It will be fun. I'll get to see my sister and brother and other sister and my nieces and my parents. I won't get to see my bulldoggies, because they both died since I've last been home. :(


• Reading of the current book, The Engineer of Human Souls by Josef Somebody is going fairly slowly. And it's going to go even more slowly today because I forgot to bring it with me. Crap. Maybe I'll read the great short story Jon by George Saunders again. It's wonderful and if you loved me you'd read it. Kimmerly was the one who introduced it to me, and she's pretty. So you know it's good.


• Fast fact: 14% of dolphins are clinically depressed. Source: JoeyHemlock's Book of Made-Up Facts, University of Joeyville Press, 2007.


• I've had a tattoo for ten days now, and I still haven't gotten laid. I totally wasn't expecting this. I guess the next step is becoming a drummer. And if that doesn't work, I'll have to buy a motorcycle.


• Today for lunch, it's chicken ettoufee. For dinner, it's probably left-over queso fundido. Yummy. I'm getting the shits just thinking about it. Last night I made pan-roasted chicken and ate it all. Basically that's a whole chicken. I ate a whole chicken yesterday. Well, not the feet and beaks, but the rest of it.


• I really should work on a screenplay. What do I have to lose?


• Only one more person needed for the fantasy football league I'm trying to put together. The winner of the league gets a CD with 138 E/Eels MP3's, courtesy of the fine folks down at JoeyHemlock's Chicken Emporium and Lube Shop. Anyone? Anyone?


• Edited to add: Steely Dan sax player Cornelius Bumpus may be the coolest person in history, based soley on looks.

Photo Captioning fans, pay attention!

Hello, friend. Do you like writting humorous captions for photographs? If so, you may join my new community, captionkangaroo. A picture is posted, and you write a caption for the photograph in the comments. You can participate by writing captions, or you can just read them and enjoy the humor. Join now!

Edited to add: Maybe I should have called it CaptionCrunch. Oh well, it'll do.

*Le sigh*

I <3 Katie and Francesca totally and to death. Why must they both live so far away? I'm going to see them BOTH, one way or another, in the next year or so. It is resolved.