KarmaPoints™

Karma should be more like S&H Green Stamps. I should have a cubic assload of good KarmaPoints™ saved up by now (including a few from that fucker last night that I gave a ride and $2.56 to last night because he "ran out of gas". Then shouldn't I take you to a gas station and not a party store?). But how many KarmaPoints™ do I have? I don't know. There's no sort of counting mechanism in place. There are no little stamps that I can paste into booklets or web site that I can go to to check. And even if there was, there's not a freaking catalog where I can trade 'em in. If you spend a year volunteering at a hospital spongebathing old ladies, well that's a very nice thing to do. You get a million KarmaPoints™ for that. You can get a DVD player and the special edition of Boogie Nights. Or this fine Stipula Duetto fountain pen. Yeah, it's not a lot for all that work, but you're not doing it for the KarmaPoints™ or the prize, you're doing it because you're a good person and this is just a little "hey, you're a good person" gift. And if you've spent over 30 years trying to be a decent person, then, dammit, you should have enough KarmaPoints™ saved up to get a really nice girlfriend-of-your-dreams or winning the lottery or something.

Also, KarmaPoints™ should be transferrable so if you want to help out a friend you can. And since you're helping out, you might get a few extra KarmaPoints™ to boot. Unless you're helping out just to get the extra KarmaPoints™, because then you're being a greedy dickhead and exploiting the system, and that revokes some KarmaPoints™. Yes, KarmaPoints™ are a two-way street, my friend.

Poems of the day

The Poetry of Donald Rumsfeld.

Forgive me father for I have sinned.

On Lent: In the last week, I have had three sodas and bid on pens on eBay numerous times (though have not yet won any auctions).

I shall now hunker-down and start again. NO MORE for the next 12 days. Probably.

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