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The Streak is Over, Long Live the Streak.
Nov. 5th, 2001 11:33 am05 November 2001 - Joey Hemlock of Lindenhurst, Illinois, broke a personal long-standing streak this morning when he threw up. The previous time that Mr. Hemlock had vomited was in 1993, often remembered as "the Hawaiian Punch" incident. The time prior to that was in 1985. "The good thing," commented Hemlock, "is that now I should be good until 2009."
In this incident, "Bad BK" was listed as the official cause of the barfing. "I had a Whopper that I bought yesterday afternoon but didn't eat, so I reheated it for a midnight snack," Hemlock explained. "I'm just glad that I made it to the toilet, and didn't drop in my cell phone or something in the toilet while I was hoarking."
When asked if he would stop eating at Burger King after the incident, Mr. Hemlock insisted that he would continue to frequent the establishment. "It's not their fault that I let a sandwich sit around for eight hours before I ate it. This is a case of one bad burger. The ad says have it your way, and this time I chose to have it chunky and acidic."
Critics of Mr. Hemlock insist that the bad burger was just a cover for the real cause of the vomiting. Ralph Upchuck of the Institute of Vomit Control commented, "Okay, we have positive proof that Mr. Hemlock drank the better part of a bottle tequila two weeks ago, and then he had about six shots of Jagermeister all at once last weekend, all without puking. We hypothesize that Mr. Hemlock had four beers and a bottle of Jameson's and just finally got caught by the vomit demon. Without further proof, the IVC cannot officially declare this a NAV (non-alcoholic vomiting). And isn't it convenient that Mr. Hemlock flushed all of the evidence?"
Allegations that Mr. Hemlock caught a stomach virus while tongue-kissing a friend's dog could not be verified.
In this incident, "Bad BK" was listed as the official cause of the barfing. "I had a Whopper that I bought yesterday afternoon but didn't eat, so I reheated it for a midnight snack," Hemlock explained. "I'm just glad that I made it to the toilet, and didn't drop in my cell phone or something in the toilet while I was hoarking."
When asked if he would stop eating at Burger King after the incident, Mr. Hemlock insisted that he would continue to frequent the establishment. "It's not their fault that I let a sandwich sit around for eight hours before I ate it. This is a case of one bad burger. The ad says have it your way, and this time I chose to have it chunky and acidic."
Critics of Mr. Hemlock insist that the bad burger was just a cover for the real cause of the vomiting. Ralph Upchuck of the Institute of Vomit Control commented, "Okay, we have positive proof that Mr. Hemlock drank the better part of a bottle tequila two weeks ago, and then he had about six shots of Jagermeister all at once last weekend, all without puking. We hypothesize that Mr. Hemlock had four beers and a bottle of Jameson's and just finally got caught by the vomit demon. Without further proof, the IVC cannot officially declare this a NAV (non-alcoholic vomiting). And isn't it convenient that Mr. Hemlock flushed all of the evidence?"
Allegations that Mr. Hemlock caught a stomach virus while tongue-kissing a friend's dog could not be verified.
